I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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