with your own penis?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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