My friends, they love my intelligence
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
