i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize