69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
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