evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
