Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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