So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
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I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
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Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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