My balls are so social today.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Just pee around me
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
