Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize