I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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