All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
