Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
