I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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