chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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