he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
