Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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