Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Shame - the story of my life.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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