Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
