Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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