you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I think i got beer on your cat.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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