He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
bring money and cleavage
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Someone signed my nipple.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
