Plan B is the new Plan A
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
