the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
