I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
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They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
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Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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