Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
