Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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