I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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