He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
