You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
