im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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