this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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