I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize