So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize