Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
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Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
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She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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