i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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