Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
