...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I didn't notice because vodka
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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