That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
