You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is it with giant penises always finding me
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize