Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
