did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
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my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Couch. On fire.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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