If you die in college, do you die in real life?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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