im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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