how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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