We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
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Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
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I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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