i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Randomize