i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
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it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
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Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.