so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
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My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
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I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence