My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
