I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize