I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
