i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
